I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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