Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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