can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
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