You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
