"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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