Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
