He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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