Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
