I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
