idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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