This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Randomize
