dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
