Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
