i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
The adults are the big ones right?
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