So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Randomize
