It's Friday. Sex?
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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