I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.