If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
worst night to have a conscience
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
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