So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Randomize