the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
