she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
