I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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