They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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