3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize