You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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