just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
