We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Randomize
