Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
