I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
