lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
