update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
