we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize
