covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
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