You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
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