jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
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