Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
