Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
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