Got a toothbrush?
Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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