I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize