Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
