i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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