my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
