I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Randomize
