When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
