i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Randomize
