I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
