Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(917): View more from New York City

your butthole totally puckers for the ginge

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(917): your butthole totally puckers for the ginge http://tfl.nu/9qqb

Replies (1) Good night (779) Bad night (978) Order T-Shirt
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(912): View more from Georgia

I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.

(678): View more from Georgia

I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home

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(912): I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar. (678): I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home http://tfl.nu/hat9

Replies (14) Good night (1380) Bad night (681)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?

(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?

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(412): Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option? (412): I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be? http://tfl.nu/cvc8

Replies (82) Good night (2687) Bad night (473)
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(205): View more from Alabama

i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!

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(205): i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL! http://tfl.nu/gtw6

Replies (92) Good night (1762) Bad night (4260) Order T-Shirt
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(419): View more from Ohio

doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.

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(419): doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars. http://tfl.nu/h8m5

Replies (15) Good night (5864) Bad night (591)
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(501): View more from Arkansas

All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.

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(501): All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware. http://tfl.nu/9chk

Replies (5) Good night (4349) Bad night (698) Order T-Shirt
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"

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(617): it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast" http://tfl.nu/sn1x

Replies (11) Good night (1865) Bad night (2937) Order T-Shirt
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.

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(+44): He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine. http://tfl.nu/yc2p

Replies (11) Good night (4423) Bad night (836) Order T-Shirt
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(602): View more from Arizona

Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...

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(602): Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship... http://tfl.nu/dw4u

Replies (23) Good night (1008) Bad night (6509) Order T-Shirt
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(320): View more from Minnesota

there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off

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(320): there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off http://tfl.nu/58y7

Replies (13) Good night (2714) Bad night (904) Order T-Shirt
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(808): View more from Hawaii

I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time

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(808): I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time http://tfl.nu/zdse

Replies (5) Good night (937) Bad night (1980) Order T-Shirt
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(+61): View more from Australia

He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?

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(+61): He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday? http://tfl.nu/aaeg

Replies (5) Good night (1856) Bad night (1098) Order T-Shirt
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(703): View more from Virginia

Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?

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(703): Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible? http://tfl.nu/w9is

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(709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.

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(709): I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking. http://tfl.nu/va6a

Replies (2) Good night (1684) Bad night (662) Order T-Shirt
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.

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(215): the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked. http://tfl.nu/uz4z

Replies (4) Good night (604) Bad night (147) Order T-Shirt

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