Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
wow bdsm is so cute
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
