I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize