I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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