you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
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